Subordination. Submission. Obedience.
These are not words often found in the vocabulary of a modern woman. In fact, most modern women are taught to reject such ideals. They are equal to men. They are liberated and free from subordination.
Yet God’s Word commands us to lay aside the modern definition of liberation and embrace His plan and design for our lives, realizing that His plan for marriage was one of protection. The man is submitted to God the Father and those in authority over him (his employer, pastor and governing authorities). The woman is submitted to her husband. Children are submitted to their parents.
Chain of command.
And when this authority structure is in proper order, every part is protected. Titus directed the older women to teach the younger women: “[To be] discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed” (Titus 2:5, KJV).
Sadly, today many older women instruct the younger women to embrace their liberty, freedom and equality!
However, women’s liberation didn’t stop at equality. It has run roughshod over men. When you look at movies, sitcoms and commercials, men are fat, lazy, stupid oafs who watch TV and drink beer, while women are skinny, smart, in shape and have found their place in the corporate world.
As my dad says, “The most discriminated person in American right now is the white balding male with a bit of a belly.”
The first step to embracing submissive obedience is to reject today’s image of the male species. Never before have men been so disrespected as they are now.
I call it reverse chauvinism!
We are so blind to the fact that we view them as many men used to view women. Women are viewed to be superior in mind and body while men are have a lesser ability for obtaining knowledge beyond football and auto mechanics.
God created man in His image; therefore, to look at men through this distorted prism is to view God and His creative work as the same.
The second step to embracing submissive obedience is to reject the world’s view of liberation. God didn’t liberate woman so she could enjoy an equal position with man. God’s design for a woman is not for her to be used and abused by her husband, nor is it to share an equal position with him. His design for her is to joyfully and embrace her position under the man’s loving protection.
In this position, she has the ability to possess and share her opinions on household matters—with the understanding that she does not have the right to the last word. She must relinquish that right to the one to whom it was given by right of his position—her husband.
The third step to embracing submissive obedience is to truly view your husband as your authority. No, you are not his child. Your relationship with him is a delicate balance of closest companion and leader/protector/head. It is a perfect balance of companionship and respect, true freedom and submission, friendship and obedience.
I have spent the past several weeks pondering this topic. It counteracts everything we’ve ever been taught that our position and rights as women should be.
Do I really obey? When he asks me to do something for him, what is my reaction? When he makes a decision I do not agree with, how do I respond? When he corrects the children differently than I would, do I correct him? When he makes a decision without consulting me first, do I feel that my position and authority have been negated in some way? When he puts his foot down on a matter and assumes his authority as the head of the home by telling me what I should do, do I suddenly feel an urge to rebel?
Do my reactions and responses reflect society’s norm? Do they mirror how a “modern woman” is portrayed in the media today? Or do they mirror God’s design for me? Humility. Subordination. Submission. Obedience. Respect. Honor. Love.
Obedience and submission are not just actions. They are attitudes that fuel our action.
Rosilind Jukic is an American girl married to a Bosnian guy who lives in a small village just outside of Zagreb. They have two crazy boys 3 and under who are as opposite as boys can be. When Rosilind isn’t writing, she is dreaming up recipes and searching for ways to organize her home better. You can find her at A Little R & R, where she writes about missions, marriage and family, toddler activities, and her recipes.
