When Pastor Todd Mullins first stepped into leadership at Christ Fellowship Church, he carried a heavy sense of inadequacy. Surrounded by spiritual giants like John Maxwell and Reinhard Bonnke in the congregation, he found himself battling fear and self-doubt.
“I was praying and bringing all my fears to God in that season, my insecurities like, I don’t think I can do this, God. I don’t have what it takes,” Mullins recalls on the Rich Wilkerson Jr. podcast.
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But instead of receiving a comforting affirmation from God, Mullins heard something unexpected. “What I got from the Lord was, yeah, you don’t have what it takes and you’re not enough.”
Initially stunned, Mullins soon realized the grace in God’s words. “The Holy Spirit said, ‘But I am enough. You don’t have what it takes, but I have what you need.'”
This pivotal moment shaped what would later become a life message, encapsulated in his book, Don’t Let Doubt Take You Out.
“If we learn to leverage that self-doubt and that question that comes up, it can actually be the benefit of doubt—it keeps us dependent… the benefit of doubt is that it keeps us desperate for God,” Mullins says.
Although he grew up in a supportive, faith-filled home, Mullins says certain experiences left scars that triggered long-standing insecurities. “There were things that happened to me when I was a kid—not from home but from school… things that were said over me that I just carried with me my whole life.”
He explains how moments of uncertainty can lead to “lifelong insecurity if we’re not careful to deal with those situations.”
Mullins now counsels high-level leaders, many of whom are wildly successful yet still plagued by doubt. “They still struggle with, ‘Am I good enough as a father? I don’t know that I’m doing right for my marriage. I don’t know that I’m living up to the expectations.'” The point, he says, is universal: “All of us deal with self-doubt at some stage.”
Instead of allowing that doubt to disqualify us, Mullins encourages believers to see it as a signal—a spiritual dashboard warning light. “If you actually pay attention to it, you can actually deal with it before it takes you out.”
Leadership for Mullins has also meant cultivating emotional discipline. “I’ve had to learn how to take control of that and not let that control me… not let my fears or my worries or my anxiety… control who I am…I talk to myself a lot… just telling my soul what to think, reminding my soul of the Scriptures.”
Ultimately, Todd Mullins believes overcoming doubt isn’t about developing more confidence in ourselves, but in God. “We walk through life with a sense of ‘Godfidence’—not a confidence in me but a God-confidence… The truest thing about you is what God said about you.”
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Abby Trivett is content development editor for Charisma Media.