For the first 12 years of my life, I fought to be free from asthma and to win my mother’s love. Oh, how I wanted to please her!
I won the victory over the asthma but lost the battle for my mother’s love. When I was only 14, she died.
Shortly after her death, my father moved out of our home, leaving me and my three sisters all alone. I felt abandoned, broken and scared.
At 14, I was raped by a neighborhood boy, who victimized me in order to win a bet. The rape led to an unwanted pregnancy and an abortion. I became very bitter and angry.
After two abusive marriages and the death of one of my three children, I was sure my life was in vain. I believed that my only purpose was to suffer.
In 1990, after I’d been out all night, I returned home at 6 o’clock on a Sunday morning and heard the voice of the Lord. He said to me, “Go to church.”
I thought I was imagining things, but He spoke to me again, “Go to church.” I went and saw a friend of mine there who was praising God with such fervor that I said, “I want what she has.” That day I received salvation and was filled with the Holy Spirit.
Since then, I’ve had my share of challenges, but God has directed me by His Spirit and led me into the truth of who I am in Him. The Lord has used me to minister to others who are lost, lonely, abused and rejected.
Today I’m preparing for full-time service as a missionary. I have found that the unconditional love I’ve sought all my life can be found only in the Lord.
